I think the only reason your car started after u changed the fuel filter is because you relived the fuel pressure and emptied out the fuel rail when u pulled the lines. The engine probably was uber flooded and then u let some out so it started. Im going to say weak/out of time spark is your issue. Leave ur fuel system alone.
Remember you said when you couldn't start it the first time you smelled alot of fuel? Why are you thinking fuel system is your issue then? Unless you see a puddle of gas under your car, concentrate on the other half of the equation, spark. I didnt read every post, but i didnt see you state you changed the spark plugs...
this is painful and unorthodox, and there's probably a better way lol, but hold a screwdriver next to each spark pulg wire and have someone crank the car...if it arcs ( it needs to shock the shit outta you, you have to make sure it HURTS, or ur gettin weak spark - man up bitch) then ur getting spark. If u get full spark and you have new plugs, then id begin to tussle with the fuel system, but i doubt that's ur issue.
And to clarify, doesn't the fuel pump prime only the first time? Cuz with my walboro, it only primes on the first key turn, if i turn it off and on again, i only hear sounds from the dash and some clicks, like you heard. DONT WASTE MONEY because of failtacular troubleshooting.
When you washed ur car, did you be a big nub and wash under ur hood without covering the distributor?